Hello, I am electricity!  You may know me from such functions as keeping your food chilled and unspoiled, even during the hot months, and supplying your television with the power required to transmit images from thousands of miles away.  I think it is time we had a talk- just to clear the air.  Frankly, I have put out in this relationship, over and over, and you do nothing but abuse me every time.  It started out as something beautiful!  Honestly, how many brilliant (and deliciously horrible) movies have we viewed together?  Even being a negatively charged system of hyper-active electrons, I cannot begin to count!  Then you started taking advantage of me.  Leaving me all alone at night, while you slept to the soothing sounds that your stereo provided for you.  That hurt.  Granted, I probably went a bit over the edge when I set your computer on fire.  But baby, I already apologized for that, and I really did mean it!  I am sorry about that.  Let us forget about our petty quarrels and tiffs, and get things back to the way the were.  I can't stand this awkwardness anymore, and I just want the old you back.  I know it can work out between us if we just keep an open, honest relationship.  I promise I will work on my problems with the VCR and DVD player, but this can't be a one-sided relationship.  I need you with me.  Are you with me?